If there was anything that God was repeatedly teaching me, again and again, here in MN, it is that my life was not meant for my own.  My life was not meant to be a vessel for my own self-fulfillment, my own joy, my own comfort, my own emotions, my own satisfaction.  My life was meant for Him.  My life was meant for others.

Time and time again I seem to re-learn that I am most joyful, centered and harnessing that gift of presence when I am not concerned with myself, but wholly with others.  It’s not natural to have our minds and hearts focused on things other than ourselves, by any means.  And often I find that when I am focused on things outside of me, I am always, always in the present.  I’ve never gone hiking up Pilot Mountain (shout out to my ‘Lina readers!) and stood in awe of nature’s majesty while at the same time, dwelling on the past or the future.  I am always in the present when ever God moves me or strikes me, and I think that’s a universal truth.

Like tonight, I was not in a particularly good mood, and I can confidently say now that it was because I had been consumed with myself the entire day.  I’m naturally so past-oriented that it’s rare for me to even get out of bed in the morning without already having millions of thoughts about the previous day swirling in my head.  Today was the same and I was starting to feel depressed, which happens when I dwell a lot.  But tonight my perspective was changed listening and being with Sister Cordy.  She really has a gift of being present with people, probably because she, along with the other Sisters, have been practicing it for so long.  As I sat next to her tonight I couldn’t help but be affected by this gift of hers; I became more alert to the present and more alert to our simple visiting.  And for a few moments as we chatted we were definitely present to each other, and I was not concerned with myself like I had been all day, but really listening to her and dismissing all the egomania my brain was threatening to release.

The gift of presence is a truly remarkable, beautiful thing, and it always coincides with a concern for others and a Person outside of myself.  I’m thankful for the reminder and God’s repeated teaching of this single thing to my heart this season!

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